Monday, February 21, 2011

Nap time eludes me.

c now sleeps through the night, in her own bed, and it is THE. BEST. EVER. letting her cry it out wasn't as painful as i thought it would be. she didn't put up much of a fight. we fed her, laid her in her crib and left the room. the first night she cried on and off for 30 minutes. the second night she cried for about 7 minutes. the next night it was 5. and then zero. we have had a few flair-ups since then. like last night, when she cried for about 45 minutes. but overall she has done amazing.

i honestly can't wrap my brain around the the fact that she just up and stopped waking up in the night every two hours simply because we put her in her own bed. weird. but we'll take it.

she is now on a very solid bedtime schedule. and it's great. here is what happens if you go to cafe rio shortly before bedtime with travis and liz:

proof that c will snuggle.
just not with me.
or b.

now we are working on naps. and it's not proving to be so easy. this child won't take a nap. she desperately needs one since she is fussy and whiny all day long. we try putting her in her crib and she will scream and scream and SCREAM until we go get here. she only naps if we are holding her. and that, my friends, is just not working for us. i love holding her while she sleeps, but i literally get nothing done. ever.

any advice on making nap times work? it's getting painful. oi. i mean really, if i keep letting her scream it out is she eventually going to fall asleep? i have a really hard time letting her scream for longer than an hour. i just want the child to take a nap. even one nap would be fine. half a nap. anything!


Melissa said...

Let me know if you figure it out. Nap time is a daily struggle for us too. Thompson will at least go down eventually but it takes forever and he wakes up way too soon and is a major grump by bedtime. Our dr. suggested putting him down at the same time every day and using a cry it out method. Consistent nap times are actually starting to help a little but we still don't really have it figured out either.

Dustin and Whit said...

oh man, I feel ya. Carter wants to be held all the time too and it is wearing on my productivity around here. I don't have much advise except for letting her cry it out, it sucks big time but I think eventually she will get it. Congrats on sleeping through the night! that is a MAJOR accomplishment, pat yourself on the back for that one! Good luck with naps, let me know how it goes!

Barb @ getupandplay said...

I think I read in one of the (many, many) sleep books that babies know the difference between naps and nighttime sleep. So maybe if she can sleep somewhere else besides your arms that isn't the crib (the swing, in the carseat, etc) just go with it (because it probably won't mess up your progress at night). The goal is to get the naps by any means necessary, because she'll sleep better at night with good daytime naps.

Babies are so hard because you can get all the advice and read all the books but really you just have to try different things until you find what works for your kid! Hang in there. This stage won't last forever!

Meg said...

I wish I could take daily naps. I bet I could get C baby to do the nap thing. Just bring her on up to Portland and I will show you what to do.

Caitlin said...

happy day, that is great news :) Enjoy your sleep!

Anne, Ryan, Emily and McCoy said...

I had the same issue with Emily. I would sit in the rocking chair for hours while she slept until she was about 10 months old. The thing that worked for me was to put her down in her crib as soon as she started acting fussy or tired or even yawned or rubbed her eyes. It ended up being that her first nap was an hour after she woke up in the morning and her second nap as about two to three hours after she woke up from her first nap (i.e. wake up 8 am; nap 9 am; wake up 11 am; nap 1-2 pm; wake up 4-5 pm). Also, if you just watch her you'll notice that she gets tired about the same time every day. She'll end up setting her own nap schedule. Good luck.

Marcus and Amy said...

Oh my goodness...all the memories came flooding back into my mind. Addie did the EXACT same thing! She SOOOOO would not take naps in her crib. We either had to hold her OR hold her to sleep and then very carefully put her down on the COUCH!!! Either way, my days were VERY unproductive as well because if I held her, I could not do anything and if I could lay her down on the couch, I had to be uber quiet in what ever I did other wise she woke up!

I wish I could tell you what to do. But for me it was a lost I gave in and I ended up taking advantage of the "cuddle time" and held her to sleep and caught up on movies! Sometimes she would sleep in my arms for and hour and sometimes it was 2 1/2 hours! Either way, I was happier cause I got to watch movies and hold baby girl, and she was happier cause she got a nap. It made for a messier house for a while, but when she was awake she was happier and would swing or roll around and then I was able to get stuff done. One day out of the blue though...she grew out of it!! And started napping in her crib!

So my advice, try every day to get her to nap in her crib and if she won't, hold her and watch some movies!! One day, she will figure out that napping in her crib is better! BUT!! If you do find a it on your blog so that I will be prepared for the next kid! Good luck!

aimee said...

Ahhh sleep. I could talk about it all day now.

I got great advice from someone really early on to start right away in setting him in his crib and letting him fall asleep on his own. He does this great and we don't have to cry it out for naps or bedtime (well most of the time he does good. Occasionally he doesn't do so great.) It is just getting him NOT to wake up in the night so many times that is killing me. I don't know what to do. He wants to eat and I'm sure I am creating a bad habit by just appeasing him but I still worry about the screaming with the neighbors at 2am.

My one advice I could give is to create the same routine. We have a sound machine so that always goes on, then I give him the binkie and then he gets the swaddle. Then I rock him for a few seconds, give him a kiss, and set him in there. This is the sleep routine and it works pretty good. So I would just say 1) sound machine for white noise 2) establish a routine.

But I also know that I know nothing and that each kid is different so hang in there! I am jealous of your all night sleeper.

k.k. chamberlain said...

Friend, I am SO glad that CIO worked for you!!

As for naps, I don't know. Isaac actually takes pretty good naps, but since we've been at my mom's house it's been difficult. I think all the advice you got above is REALLY helpful. Here are some of the things that really have worked for us.

I don't let him cry it out for naps--if he fusses longer than 5 minutes, I go in and rock him, give him a paci, nurse him (ONLY if he's hysterical or sounding stuffy), whatever. I also have a VERY STRICT naptime and daytime schedule. I feed him at the same time, give him naps at the same time. (I go more by intervals than by times, but it's really pretty consistent.)

Items to help: We have a white noise machine that's great. Also, he has a "lovey" (a monkey blanket--I think I showed it to you at church) that he loves to cuddle.

So, I base his nap schedules on when he gets up. His first nap is usually 1 1/2 (sometimes more, sometimes less) hours after he wakes. I get him all ready for the day and have serious playtime while he's awake so he's all tuckered out. Then as soon as he starts to fuss or rub his eyes, I grab his paci, blanket, and monkey. I wrap him up and put him on my lap and we sit and watch TV for a few minutes. Eventually, he'll start to zone out (rub his eyes, rub his cheek on his monkey, grunt) so I know to go put him in his crib. In the No Cry Sleep Solution, she gave a tip that really worked for me. Isaac was waking up 30 to 40 minutes into his nap and wanting to be done. Pantley (the author) says to do something close by the baby's room so as soon as baby wakes you can run in there quick to soothe. I did that for a little while and eventually, Isaac just started soothing himself back to sleep. Also, I require at least 90 minutes of naptime, so if he wakes up prematurely, I try to put him back down, no matter how cheerful and perky he seems. Sometimes he'll get up for five minutes and go back down.

The first nap of the day is always the easiest and longest and the third nap of the day is always the hardest and shortest. (I can usually only get 60 minutes out of him that last nap.)

Seriously. I hear you on the screaming for an hour. We tried to do it the other day (like I said, sleeping at my mom's house in a pack and play has been really tough) and by the end of the hour I was a total monster. You'd think I'd been the one crying hysterically for all that time.

The last and most obvious thing ... trust your instincts. If it's killing you, go get her. Rock her, put her down, and if she cries, pick her up and try again. Over and over. That's what I did. She wants to sleep, but she's probably just afraid of being alone. Isaac cries everytime he can't see me lately. This makes showering and getting ready super complicated. So just know that this is also probably partly separation issues as well as day sleep issues.

This is the longest comment ever!! I'm so sorry. But call or text if you want to talk about it. It just helps to know you're not totally alone out there!

Stephanie said...

I didn't go through everyone's comments, so I apologize if this is a repeat, but this is what worked for us:
Put her down just like you do for bed. Let her scream for 5 minutes and then go in and lie her back down without saying anything, just lovingly put her down again. Next time wait 10 minutes, then 15. The key is to never say anything, and eventually she will get that you are not going to come rescue her, but just put her back down and there is no point in crying. She will know you are still there, not abandoning her, but that it's time for her to sleep. Good luck!