so last week...
-weatherman cried because he had to wear a speedo
-ali went on one on one dates with frodo of the shire (which is what i will be calling frank from now on) and hot michael phelps (which is what i will be calling that guy whos name i have never bothered to learn who looks like a hot michael phelps)
-weatherman cried some more because the guy with the hair made fun of him*
and now on to this week...*
ali "picked" roberto for the one on one date. and i say "picked" because i highly doubt ali has any say in anything that happens on this show. ali clearly likes roberto. which she should. look at him (but pretend he's not wearing a necklace):
and crap cakes, why did ali have to go and make herself all likable by actually saying to the camera that she wonders if roberto is too hot for her. he is. obviously. those were my thoughts exactly. and i wrote it on the blog 2 weeks ago. but for her to say that out loud sort of brings her down to a real person level. and makes her seem all normal and shiz. hrmph. me no likey.
p.s. ali looked cuter this week. but you didn't hear that from me.
anyways...onwards...yes, roberto is hot. real hot. and she likes him a lot. i predict him in the top 3 for sure. maybe even roberto for the win.*
and then the group date, which consisted of ali and her band of dorky, border-line attractive followers dancing awkwardly under an overpass to the "hip", musical stylings of the bare naked ladies. yeesh. and then they get to make a pretend music video! how not embarrassing for all of them!
my two favorite parts...
1-weatherman crying for the eleventyith time since the show aired because he couldn't quite pull off the pretend music video kiss with ali. he clearly has some issues. but then ali goes and makes herself likeable AGAIN (!!!) by kissing him so he wouldn't feel so bad. that was real nice of her. and i'm serious because it was also probably one of the hardest things she has ever had to do. kissing him would be like...would you rather have your hand sawed off with a butter knife or your legs bitten off by a shark? that is how bad it would have to be deciding to kiss weatherman. he is a total tool. of course weatherman is so oblivious and WEIRDO that he goes ahead and thinks the kiss was the real deal. and then these words ACTUALLY leave his mouth..."when ali kissed me, it was sort of like a rocket ship blew up emotionally". ummm....ok....wow. WOW.a million times ew. 2-that kissing scene with this guy whose name i don't know:that was seriously hot. seriously. i like him. he can be in the top 3 as well.
then the wrestler walks to ali's. that was totally his own idea. i'm sure the show had absolutely nothing to do with that. nothing at all. and i guess i'm supposed to care about that and find it sweet or something. except i don't care. the wrestler, in my opinion, is basically a smarter version of wes. he's pimping himself out on tv but at least he's being sly about it. i predict good things to come from the wrestler. and by good things i mean bad things that i will find entertaining and hilarious. followed by one on one date with mcgoo here:
he's weird. and gone. good.*
followed by ali wearing yet another prom dress to the rose ceremony. i feel like she found these dresses while flipping through the prom section of an alyse's bridal catalogue. what's with the prom dresses? seeing her in that fugly prom dress filled me with such rage. i'm serious. maybe it's the pregnancy. but seriously, what. is. with. the. PROM. DRESSES?!
my guess for top four:
and the ones i really hate:
and the ones who may or may not be on this show? does anyone even know who these guys are?